Wellness is an important part of my journey. As a young widow, I was determined to be healthy for my kids, so they wouldn’t lose another parent. But I would go to extremes. I pushed myself too hard, and eventually my body crashed. It has taken me a long time to have a healthy view of wellness and to see it as an act of worship.
The Bible says, “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” I Corinthians 6:19-20
God gave us our bodies. They are His temple, and He wants us to take care of them. That is an act of worship! This can be easier said than done sometimes, as we get busy with life, stressed about various things, have little to no energy or are overwhelmed by the endless fad diets and exercise programs out there. Or we just don’t want to change our habits.
Read more...There’s a misconception about widowhood that we need to “move on” after a certain time frame.
- Sometimes it’s something we tell ourselves. We put expectations on ourselves and feel like we should be at a certain point by a certain time.
- Sometimes there are unsaid expectations that are imposed on us by others through their actions and subtle hints that indicate that we should be past this point already.
- Sometimes we’re told, “Haven’t you grieved long enough? It’s time to move on”.
I have experienced all of these, and none of them are helpful.
Read more...As we continue to refocus our minds on Christ, lets look at the second and third way we can do that.
2. Cast
1 Peter 5:6-7 says, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
After Jon passed, I struggled with anxiety. At times, it was hard to have a reasonable thought, and little things would cause my heart to race and my body to go into flight mode. Sleep was difficult because my mind would race, noises would startle me, and my heart pounded with worry. So many things put me on edge, and I was constantly worried about the future. It wasn’t until I cast my anxiety on the Lord, that I began to experience relief.
Read more...Our thought life has a big influence on how we respond to situations, it affects our feelings and emotional well-being, and impacts how we view our circumstances. We have thousands and thousands of thoughts each day, and many of them are negative. As a widow, I have found that in the intensity of grief, my thoughts tend towards despondency, leaving me feeling stuck, overwhelmed and inadequate.
It’s easy to look to books on grief, self-help and mindset, and while those are not bad in and of themselves and can be helpful at times, they can become a worldly replacement for where our focus really should be, and that is on Christ. He is the only one who can truly help us change our destructive thought patterns.
Read more...Did you know...
- Only 5% of widows in the US are under 40? I was 33 when I was widowed.
- Young widows often have small kids, and life is overwhelming. Grief often gets put on the back burner until it gets too big to ignore.
- Single parenting is different as a widow. You don’t get a break like you do in a two parent household or a divorce situation. You have to intentionally carve out time without your kids.
- Young widows need support, community, encouragement, and love. We feel like we don’t fit in anywhere.