Moving Forward as a Widow
Moving forward as a widow requires courage and intention. Here are a few ways to help you move forward in acceptance:
1. Acknowledge Your Journey: Recognize and honor the journey you've undertaken. Every tear, every moment of pain has brought you to this point of acceptance. It is a difficult road to travel, and it’s important to acknowledge the enormity of what you have gone through.
2. Prioritize Self-Care: This is one that I did not do well in my journey through grief until I was forced to. I had been burning the candle at both ends for too long, and it caught up to me. Be sure to listen to your body, rest when needed, exercise, spend time in nature and do things that fill your cup.
3. Seek Support: Engage in support groups or counseling. Sharing your journey with others who understand can provide comfort and a healthy outlook. Staying involved in my local church and getting one on one counseling was vital to my healing. It helped me gain perspective, understand unhelpful thought patterns and behaviors I was unaware of and change them, and see how the Lord had been working in my life, even through my overwhelm.
4. Create New Traditions: Develop new traditions or practices that honor your loved one. This can be a healing way to keep their memory alive while also creating new chapters in your life. Journaling was a big part of my healing journey. It helped me remember Jon, and all the good times we had, instead of dwelling on the difficulty of his illness and death. It also helped me be deliberate in choosing gratitude. My kids and I started a tradition of celebrating Jon’s birthday each year with his favorite foods and sharing memories, and we look forward to it each year.
5. Set Goals: Establish new personal goals or hobbies. Whether it’s learning a new skill or revisiting old passions, having something to look forward to is crucial. It could be something as simple as reading a book or more complex like learning to change the oil in your car. No goal or hobby is too small.
6. Invest in Others: Finding ways to help others in grief or contributing to your community and church can be immensely healing. It gives purpose and fosters a sense of connection. For many years I was resistant to being open about my grief journey, as I was afraid of what others might think. But in sharing my struggles with others, I have found there is incredible healing, not only for myself but for others who are in the midst of grief.
Acceptance is not the end but an important step in our journey through grief. It is a testament to the road we have traveled and the capacity we have to adapt and grow despite our pain. It displays God’s grace in our lives, shows the hope we have in Him, and exhibits how He has patiently brought us through. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11)
Remember, acceptance is not a destination but a part of the ongoing process of healing and living. As we walk this path, we find that while our loved ones are no longer physically present, their memories and the love we shared will always be with us.
Thank you for joining me in this series. I hope you found it helpful and informative. I have learned a lot as I was researching each stage and seeing how my journey fits within each stage. Thank you to each of you that have reached out to me with comments and encouragement as we travel this road together.
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